I have not written anything for what seemed like forever. But forever ceases to exist! And that's the bitter truth which I have been trying to swallow for the past months. My grandma passed away two months ago; and I kept crying until my tears ran dry. I must say I have never felt such excruciating pain in my life before. And that if anything ever came my way, I would simply look back, think about my grandma and say, "It doesn't hurt." But it could have hurt had I not been aching from my grandma's passing. Everything is relative so it seems. I love my grandma. If there is one person in the planet whom I truly love, it's definitely her. When she left me forever, my heart started to collapse. And in the middle is a very big hole! So big, I can almost fit the universe! I'm healing somehow but I may need time. Hopefully soon enough my heart will be whole again. But for now, I am contented living with a huge hole in my heart.
I'm filling up the void by busying myself with my thesis. After a year, I am finally getting into it. And it's about time! What took me so long, I really don't know. I've also just recently emailed a nursing home so I could do some volunteer works. I really love seeing old people smile for some reasons. Maybe if I manage to make them smile every weekend, the big hole in my heart will heal up faster.
I've also had quite a number of travels planned. I'm pretty excited! I'm away from my flat most of the time. It's hard to stay inside curled up in my bed. I can't even remember the last time I had siesta! I just love being out, enjoying the sun and the soft breeze.
Tomorrow I will be gone again! I'm heading to Melbourne with my colleagues to discuss our project. I'm so excited to learn new things from all the smart people whom I will be meeting. But the biggest challenge now is how to catch my flight. The plane leaves early; and on normal days, I wake up late.
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