How have I been?

I have not written anything for what seemed like forever. But forever ceases to exist! And that's the bitter truth which I have been trying to swallow for the past months. My grandma passed away two months ago; and I kept crying until my tears ran dry. I must say I have never felt such excruciating pain in my life before. And that if anything ever came my way, I would simply look back, think about my grandma and say, "It doesn't hurt." But it could have hurt had I not been aching from my grandma's passing. Everything is relative so it seems. I love my grandma. If there is one person in the planet whom I truly love, it's definitely her. When she left me forever, my heart started to collapse. And in the middle is a very big hole! So big, I can almost fit the universe! I'm healing somehow but I may need time. Hopefully soon enough my heart will be whole again. But for now, I am contented living with a huge hole in my heart.

I'm filling up the void by busying myself with my thesis. After a year, I am finally getting into it. And it's about time! What took me so long, I really don't know. I've also just recently emailed a nursing home so I could do some volunteer works. I really love seeing old people smile for some reasons. Maybe if I manage to make them smile every weekend, the big hole in my heart will heal up faster.

I've also had quite a number of travels planned. I'm pretty excited! I'm away from my flat most of the time. It's hard to stay inside curled up in my bed. I can't even remember the last time I had siesta! I just love being out, enjoying the sun and the soft breeze. 

Tomorrow I will be gone again! I'm heading to Melbourne with my colleagues to discuss our project. I'm so excited to learn new things from all the smart people whom I will be meeting. But the biggest challenge now is how to catch my flight. The plane leaves early; and on normal days, I wake up late. 

Free "taste" of the Latin dance craze

While I may have a pile of work-related backlogs to catch up this coming week, I am  very ecstatic to say that my weekend needs none of that! Saturday morning I forced myself to work and physically go to the lab while my brain was lackadaisically walking on a sunny street! After a while I realized working was pointless! I thought maybe I should have fun instead because it's the weekend after all! I tossed my pen, packed my bag and went home to get changed into my dancing outfit! I attended a free salsa class! It was my very first time to dance salsa but it felt so natural for me! After the class, I spent the entire evening dancing salsa, (a bit of zouk) and bachata! I had an amazing night getting reunited with one of my many interests: DANCING! Looks like my girl friends and I will be spending a lot of time in different Latin dance clubs in the coming months. 

The morning person conversion

I have been robbed off sleep the past two days probably because I have been trying so hard to become a morning person. I'm really having troubles getting up early in the morning that sometimes I'm tempted to literally throw myself out of bed so that my whole body gets slammed on the wooden floor so I can immediately wake up. But because I love myself so much I would not want to get bruised for such a lame reason, I always end up rolling back and forth in bed, enjoying the warm embrace of my feather-soft quilt. Then I watch the clock's hand move from one number to another until the long hand finally makes a full turn! I struggle. I move a bit. The long hand slams itself to the next number again and again and again. Then I imagine drinking my coffee and doing yoga. Finally, I sit at the corner of my bed. But many times I find myself hitting the sack again and fall back to my dreamland. 

 

It has been like this since I decided to try to become a morning person. I will try again for the last time tomorrow! But this time I ate a hearty dinner. Hopefully the insulin in my bloodstream would spike up and rob my brain off the oxygen so I'd feel a bit sluggish and this nocturnal body of mine will fall into a deep sleep. 

Banoffee pie

Chocolate curls

I love baking and making desserts. Unfortunately, I don't like eating a lot. And I find tasting way more pleasurable than eating. Hence, the big problem arises when I'm done making desserts and I just want to taste a little piece but do not really wish to eat the entire lot. What happens to the rest?

A sinful slice!

Luckily, at my work place, we hold "cake club" every second Friday. Someone gets assigned to bring something sweet on that day. Because we are a big group, my turn to bake only comes every 3 to 4 months or so. But my desire to create an experimental dessert "burns" more frequently than that. So every now and then, I try to find an excuse to bring my experiment into the table. The latest one was two weeks ago when one of my colleagues in the lab had to say goodbye as she had to go back to her country. 

The pie without the chocolate curls

Several days before that I asked her what she wanted for her goodbye tea party. And she said, "I really love banoffee pie!" I got so stressed when she said that because I had zero interest in making banoffee pie. I happened to try the banoffee pie in the cafe near our building and it was disgustingly sweet, I remember struggling to finish that tiny piece of insane sugar monster! I thought there was no way I could ever bring myself to make a dessert I hate. But because I really liked my friend, I spent three nights conditioning myself that I had to make one "crazy" banoffee pie. I took a random recipe online and as usual, made a number of modifications such as adding coffee to the caramel and putting a very thin layer of it at the base. I also opted to sprinkle my pie with shaved dark chocolate and put a bit of chocolate curls in the middle. I had problems tempering my chocolate to make the curls. But I surprisingly pulled it off in the end. The dessert looks complicated, but it's actually very easy to make. 

I was so ecstatic to see everyone's face light up when I saw them eating my pie. They really loved it especially my friend! I was so happy to see her smile. In making desserts, I follow two rules: Less Sugar and More Love.

Stradbroke, Queensland

Point lookout.

My friends and I went to Stradbroke Island last week and it was nothing short of amazing! I would probably do it every weekend if I had the time, money and energy. The sun was excruciatingly unforgiving though; but l brought a liter of sunscreen for everyone to use and that definitely saved our skin cells from mutating!

Wild current at Point lookout.

Our first stop was at Point Lookout. We walked through a short trekking path which gave us the chance to see the meandering river. Many parts looked breathtakingly dramatic with the violent current bashing the frothy river water onto the rocks. Some areas were serene as the water was still and quiet.

Yoga at cylinder beach,

After a quick lunch, we then headed to the Cylinder beach! The current was stronger than usual. But we still jumped through. I stayed in the shallow portion because I'm a ridiculously awful swimmer. In fact, I can't swim well. But I really enjoyed throwing myself into the waves and getting swallowed for a while. But what I did was not dangerous at all because I made sure the water level was not beyond 2/3 of my height. (Which means, it was pretty shallow). We bathed in the sun for the rest of the afternoon. My yellow skin just turned golden brown and I was extremely amazed! Now I know why brown is more beautiful in Australia. When you are brown, it usually means you had more fun in the sun. I don't ever want to be a white Asian again. Golden brown is definitely better.

Pretentious shampoo commercial at the Brown lake.

The next day, my friend and I woke up early to do yoga. I have always wanted to do yoga on the beach; and I just made my dream come true. I woke up my friend really early just to do yoga with me that day. It was ridiculously early and I had to make her coffee. 

We also went to the Brown lake. The lake is surrounded by tea trees! The tea tree oil gets infused into the water; and it had a therapeutic effect. The lake was brown too (but very clean)! Swimming at the brown lake made me feel like I'm an ant in a huge tea cup. 

It was a fantastic weekend. Unfortunately, I left my brain on the island and the entire week I was struggling so much to fish my brain back. 

Forming habits: my new books and old yoga routine

I love books!

And I love yoga! The modified wheel pose.

Forming a habit is easier than I thought! I say so because I have been doing yoga almost every weekdays before I head to the lab. If I don't do it, I always notice a sudden drop in my energy level! Yoga is nearly tantamount to drinking coffee (with milk) in the morning! I'm now on my 6th week of yoga training, and I intend to go on for as long as I can. I really enjoy yoga as it literally calms my nerves. I always do yoga first thing in the morning. It seemingly draws the sunshine to my occasionally bleak student life. 

My morning habits are pretty much stable. However, I intend to make some changes in my evening routine as I have noticed I'm becoming a little bit "unhinged". Unhinged in the sense that I actually "find myself staring at the wall." 

To replace this dreadful habit of staring at the wall, I have amassed yet another batch of books. I have been reading The Taste of War the past few days and I quite like it. However, as it is a world war two book, I find that it is somewhat heavy for a bedtime story. Hence, I need to pick up another book to read along side The Taste of War. I hope to read an hour everyday before I retire to bed. I just need to have the discipline to stick to such habit in the same manner as my morning yoga. 

Tomorrow is the beginning of another work week. I never picked up on work this weekend by the way. I was so busy drooling over my books and celebrating Chinese New Year with my friends! Cheers to the new year and my new habits!  新年快乐!

Lone Pine Koala Sanctuary

 I was cleaning my desk awhile ago when I saw three printed postcards of me holding a koala! I wondered who to give them to; and suddenly I had this awesome idea of sending them to my siblings since the three of them live in three different places! I don't think they will be so pleased to receive a postcard which supports my ever inflating vanity though! But the mere thought that my siblings will be somewhat irked to see my face on a postcard makes me smile from ear to ear. 

The postcard photo was taken when my friends and I went to Lone Pine Koala Sanctuary in Brisbane. It's one of the best places to visit if you ever want to see koalas in flesh and blood. In fact, I have never seen koalas in the wild despite the road signs which tell people to beware of koalas crossing! In some areas they even built a tiny hanging bridge solely for koalas to cross. But watching them cross must be a fairy tale!

I paid 20 dollars for my photo to be taken and I must say it was all worth it because hugging the koala made me feel fuzzy and warm in the inside. 20 dollars is pricey for a photo; but the profits will go to building a better sanctuary for these poor sleepy creatures, so it's definitely a win! 

Other animals were also in the sanctuary. There is this area where people can enter and interact with kangaroos! I got the chance to feed them on my hands! Although I must say it was very ticklish! I would have enjoyed the feeding experience a lot better if I didn't get tickled. I wanted to hug the kangaroos but they apparently did not like me. I would love to think it was because of my hat and not because I looked scary. 

I remember I really enjoyed my time at the sanctuary. I am longing to visit more places like this in Brisbane. I'm just waiting for my friends to invite me to go with them. I'm definitely in!